Did you know that coaching is an entirely unregulated industry?
Anyone can call themselves a coach. Not only this, there’s often confusion about what coaching even is. It’s no wonder you might struggle to decide who to work with!
So, I thought I’d share my thoughts on how to pick a dating coach and highlight a few potential red flag behaviours worth considering before you part with your money.
1. Press features don’t guarantee a good coach
Being featured in the press doesn’t automatically make someone a great coach. I know this because I’ve been approached time and time again by PR companies offering to get me featured— for a fee. I’ve even been asked to pay to be included on “Top UK Dating Coach” lists-I politely declined.
Not all press comes from paid PR, of course, and genuine features do exist. However, press coverage alone isn’t enough to guarantee someone is a good coach or a good fit for you.
2. Are they a coach, consultant, or something else entirely?
Before signing up, check if the person offers pure coaching (as per the industry definition) or if they’re a consultant, mentor, or even a pick-up artist.
It’s perfectly fine if you’re looking for something other than coaching, but it’s helpful to know the difference. Personally, I provide both ICF-aligned coaching and consultancy, and I’ve found most clients seek the latter but can benefit from both.
3. Look for relevant experience and qualifications
What’s their background in the dating industry? Do they have relevant coaching qualifications or credentials? If they don’t, what kind of commitment are they making to their professional development? These are the questions to ask when assessing someone’s credibility.
4. Beware of titles like “UK’s Best Coach”
There are a few “UK’s best” and “UK’s leading” dating coaches. If someone uses labels like this in their marketing and you value honesty and transparency, ask what it’s based on. What evidence supports their claim?
5. Question success rate claims
I don’t track client success rates, as every client’s goals are unique and deeply personal. What matters most to me is helping clients clarify what they want and helping them feel empowered to take steps towards it.
If a coach claims to have an impressive success rate, ask how they define success. Are they tracking short-term wins or long-term outcomes? How long do they follow up with past clients to ensure their results last? Ask them what type of results they’d expect you might get.
6. Always book a discovery call
A good coach won’t push you to work with them immediately—they’ll want to ensure you’re a good fit first.
You should book a free discovery call and feel no guilt if you decide not to proceed. That’s your prerogative. A good coach won’t apply pressure or make you feel guilty about your decision.
Choosing the right coach is a personal decision, and it’s worth taking the time to find someone who aligns with your needs, values, and goals.
If you’re considering working with a dating coach, feel welcome to book a free consultation with me to see if we’re a good fit. If I think you’re better suited to someone else or that we aren’t the right fit, I’ll happily refer you elsewhere.